Generalized Anxiety
I’m feeling some general anxiety, the source of which I can’t seem to pin down. Or actually, maybe I can pin it down, it’s just that it’s coming from a bunch of different sources and so it’s not easy for me to focus in on it and say, “Oh, that’s not so bad, that will be resolved after [blah] and I can relax then.”
- I’m trying to avoid enrolling my son in a before school program because it will cost me $250 a month for about fifteen minutes a day (the time between when I need to leave in order to get to work on time and when his bus comes) but the best I can arrange means that I will be 10-15 minutes late to work every day. Do I pretend that I’m arriving on time and worry endlessly about getting “caught?” Do I try to arrange this slightly odd schedule with my boss by offering to work a little later in the evenings and risk that taking up all his variable schedule goodwill and thereby not allowing me to take a half day off every other week so that I can volunteer in my son’s classroom?
- I just sent in renewal paperwork but I’m afraid that now that my childcare costs are less, my net income (income minus what I pay for childcare) will result in my boys no longer qualifying for medicaid, which means that I have to choose between paying $800 a month for their benefits or having them go without (their dad has already made it very clear that he will not pay any part of their benefits). Although my childcare costs are less, they are definitely not $800 less.
- My boss officially leaves in three months and the opening for his position should be announced any day. Do I talk to him about the job? Do I apply? Do I want the job either way? Would I look like an ass if I applied? Do I need the stress of applying? Do I need the stress of the job? How much does the fact that it starts at $25k more than what I make now play into my decision?
- Was it just me or did the center I visited yesterday with my two year old seem kind of cold and unloving toward the children? Am I just projecting my own anxiety onto them? Is it the wrong choice to send my two year old there, even if just for two days a week? He’s going to be upset about it for sure, is it worth disrupting his little life? Even if means I might be able to save money on overall daycare costs eventually?
- How am I going to get caught up on my school stuff? I have one month left and have been almost entirely unable to do any work for the past week. I did a timeline for my final project and I’m woefully behind on it, not to mention the regular work. I’m supposed to go camping this weekend as one last summertime hurrah, but that’s the only time I have for school work. I can’t possibly cancel on camping for the third week in a row, can I?
- Why is my house never clean? Why is my house not only never clean, but so much less clean that it used to ever be?